The Myth of Perfect Fathers
How did
children ever turn out to be law-abiding, Christ-following, responsible members
of society before we had organizations like Focus on the Family, Family
Builders and the plethora of other organizations, books and seminars? And, with
all the resources we have today, why do we have such problems with
dysfunctional and fractured families?
There is no
simple answer to either question. However, there is an indispensable factor for
both. We had fathers who were involved in families in times past, and there is
a glaring absence of many biological or functioning fathers in homes today.
Fathers of
past generations didn’t really have an edge over fathers today. They didn’t
have seminars to help them be a great dad. They didn’t listen on their iPod to
messages on fathers. They pretty much carried an example of their father and
did for their children what their father did for them. But I think one big
difference was that fathers were there in the family. They didn’t up and leave
when they got tired of their responsibility. They didn’t jump from one live-in
girlfriend to another. They knew their role and sought to be a father first and
did not worry about whether their child considered them a buddy.
I think
there was also, especially to boys, a clearer sense and example of father-hero
growing up. Maybe that’s because newspapers didn’t probe deep enough to dig up
the dirt on people, or they were more constrained in what they reported. You
didn’t have the pervasive paparazzi ready to shoot an embarrassing, unheroic
picture at a moment’s notice whenever a hero-type person went out in public.
In any
case, what many children are lacking today is a strong, godly father. And what
many men are lacking is a strong, godly example of a father.
When you
look around to see whom to pattern oneself after, you are visually plastered
with a long list of men you would not want to emulate. How many Hollywood men
and athletes are leaving a trail of kids with different mothers in their wake?
Then you have some seemingly good examples, like Brad Pitt, but do we want our
children to live with someone for eight years and have three children (plus
Angelina’s adopted three) before they
finally decide now is the time to, at least, get engaged?
It is easy
to point the finger at bad examples and fathers with faults. I do that every
morning when I look in the mirror. But we do have one perfect Father to use as
an example. And that is God. It is interesting that God chose to use the term, “father”,
to express one of his key roles to those who believe in him. And that term is more
than just a name. It is a role that God fulfills with us.
It is too
bad that today, for so many boys and girls, their perception of God as Father
is taken from their earthly father. It’s no wonder why teens who have grown up
in the church walk away and never return, and others never venture to church in
the first place. Who would want to have a relationship with God if he is like
one’s earthly father?
But because
God is perfect as Father, and because he has chosen to express his relationship
with us as our Heavenly Father, there is tremendous hope and encouragement to
every person. First, for us who are fathers, there is his example that we can
follow to understand what it means to be a father and how a father acts with
his children. He can show us how to do it.
Then there is the relationship
itself that God has with us as our Heavenly Father. That is not just a polite
term we use to refer to him. It is God himself who is a Father to us and acts
as a Father to us. The father wound that so many men and women carry because of
imperfect earthly fathers, can be healed by our Heavenly Father as he carries
out his role as Father to us.
So with
this Sunday being Fathers’ Day, we can look to our perfect, Heavenly Father, to
be what we need for us: an example of a perfect Father to pattern our father
role after, or a giver to help fill what we didn’t receive from our earthly
Father.
The message
this Sunday will feature our perfect, Heavenly Father. Come to learn; come to
receive.
Building Update
Workers continue to finish additional details on the building.
The large kitchen exhaust fan unit is ready to be installed. The paving construction
crew has cut out sections of the asphalt and prepared the area around the front
entrance for paving. The plumbers have installed all the sinks and toilets and
turned on the water in the bathrooms. Some lights are in, but more are still
coming before that is done. We are almost ready to have the city come and give
us the final approval. A few pictures that show the progress are below.
The giant exhaust-fan kitchen unit on its side and looking at its underside. |
Ready to pave. |
The Women's Bathroom |
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